I never knew it would be such a daunting task to go out to watch the new Shahrukh (well not so new, it was released ten days ago...and usually Shahrukh has yet to wash off the greasepaint and Im elbowing my way through the crowd to catch the first day first show...khair not so lucky this time around)...
Let me tell you that though the Rab was willing ...not so other people around me..and there was many a road block before I could settle down in my seat.
First one had to avoid making eye contact with Pesho before leaving the house..She has been seriously miffed that we have been out all week--it has been a nightmare finishing work, finalizing the moving (before the baby arrives on us), the doctor's appointments and catching up with people as the festive season is upon us.
Pesho JUST doesnt get it that ALL THIS IS VERY stressful and this was the first time I was doing something I WANTED...maybe she is preparing us for all the 'emotional blackmailing' the site under development will be subjecting us to eventually.
"Bahaney sab Bahaney" (excuses just excuses)
Ok, so Im finally in the theatre and the walk to my seat...major WALK OF SHAME...this time I have to avoid eye contact with all the Punjoo aunties who are whispering to each other "Vekh, vekh shameless pregnant woman watching a movie in her condition". I stare ahead steely eyed and wish I did have the "essetial pregnant woman accessory" --the knitting needles--just so I could stick them into their fat thighs for a second.
But SRK/Suri ji made up for all that and more-sigh!! For detractors who continue to pooh pooh the film (the film is the Surinder Sahni of movies...unassuming, humble, heart of gold, and lambee race ka ghoda--think the well meaning turtle which will pip everyone at the post) why cant you think beyond the question "Couldnt the wife tell?"...Arey baba, didnt you pay attention...SRK declares na "Rab willed it so" (that there were all these divine coincidences and that Tani could not see through his disguise)...so if you believe in the Rab in the Heavens and Shahrukh on earth ANYTHING can happen. And well Tani doesnt ever make eye contact with her husband so I doubt it whether she registered the famous dimples. So EVERYONE relax (and this includes the YRF crew, who are shouting themselves hoarse regarding how they looked through SRK in his Sahni avtaar the first day on the set, we get it!!)
Ok confession time...and yes I do realise that this pregnancy has been very Oprah-ish, "let the TRUE aneela out" at the moment. Ok my question is, arent we a wee bit too superstitious...I admit that I have done a fair bit of googling regarding "auspicious dates", "birth stars", consulted with people for "suitable names" and have this morbid fear of subscribing to pregnancy/birth newsletters as that would tempt the evil eye...I would rather just visit the site directly thank you, no e-letters in my inbox...and my friends do tease me about my liberal use of the phrase "nazar na lagey" (my excuse, try to understand where Im coming from...knowing what we do through 'proximity politics', where one false step can return us to starting point saanp seedhi style, life is one never ending "Go to Jail, Go directly to Jail, do not pass go, do not collect 200" card). But I realized how our silly fears do run the risk of taking over our lives, of making murky the life paths of young souls who have yet to take their first breath, and the inanity of the mental maths involved. Case in point, I ventured to the desi version of the Babycentre website (rather than the local Aussie version) and was confronted with questions regarding timing Cesareans to suit a "suitable time" on the home page....other pages had questions on rashes caused by the 'black thread' that babies wear to ward off the evil eye, and well the list went on. And I guess it was one community board exchange about how a birth at 5 minutes past a particular hour meant losses to the father, 5 minutes to the hour sufferings for the mom, 10 minutes past to the child in question, siblings, and similar problematic configurations and their repercussions for grandparents et al. Well, that was my as she puts it O! minute ...and I felt so shallow.
What is it with us? Have we really let our obsessions become the very evil demons that we want to avoid? Or did it strike me because I had some other 'portals to the world' for comparison?
Why cant we just live a little? Why do we have to fret so much? And why cant we enjoy the life changes, good and bad, that are to come?