Friday, July 31, 2009

Ché !!



My dear little revolutionary soul,

As I look back at the last six months I realize nothing that I had learnt (in what seems like another lifetime) in Revolutionary Warfare class prepared me for the urban guerilla tactics that involve Putting You to Bed, by bed I mean Your Bed... you will curl up and sleep bindaas if it involves sleeping with your parents but bring you ten inches close to your cot and you will subject us to a major tantrum. We dont know what it is. Parampara dictates that you sleep like your mother in her own room in her own cot (yup, I was such a model baby I slept on my own in the nursery from day one...should I put that on my resumé?!!), I have asked your father and he is still scratching his head trying to remember (Bilkul kuch yaad nahee araha) but his mom reminds me that he had an elder brother to give him company. I have tried to coax Pesho but she thinks uska bhee koi standard hai and balks at shrieking little bundles that throw up on her.

So your mother's number one nightmare at the moment is a scrawny little six year old with a cocky attitude, you know the Raju types, who will block your way during playtime and holler "Oye Chintu tu ab bhee Mummy Kay Saath Sota Hai Kiya" (Mom's Precious Still sleeps with His Mommy)..cue in a cacophony of "Mummy Ka Laadla, Mommy's Little Precious".. Naheeeeeeeee

However, it says something to your determination (and courage and fortitude) that you took on the Big Gun (that is my mom) and all her attempts to move you to the cot. And that is saying something! But I say in your defence:

1) You are an ideal baby as you are nazar na lagey such a good traveller. You happily curled up to me as the plane took off and just slept the duration of the flight, you 'latched on' as we started descending and when the plane taxied to the runway you stretched your arms over your head as you do when you wake up and looked up at me as if to say Chalo Brisbane Aagaya We Are There Right?. You happily bopped along as we drove some 2000 km. And you were no spoke in my wheel of spending the whole holiday scurrying from pool to steam room to jacuzzi to pool. As I keep on explaining to you Im only learning to swim properly so that you have a healthy relationship with water growing up..Uffff the things moms have to do.

2)You have been so accepting of new things. Sleeping in different hotel rooms, visiting new homes, temperature fluctuations, new people, introducing solids, you look up to us in a Aap Hai Na You there, Right? way and plunge into whatever life brings your way.

3)We feel that you are more communicative...some would say it could be your motor mouth mom's genes, but your grandmother doesnt fail to remind us how your mom didnt utter a peep until she was two (and it involved many a trip to the paediatrician and listening to mean babysitter suggestions that We Cut The Taar Nerve Under The Tongue, shudder) Of course your mom made up for all that in no time, but it counts for something when you entertain us with your repertoire of baby babble.


Six Months Old And Just Defeated The Big Guns

The thing is your parents are very happy with the way things are. And as your mother doesnt fail to remind her family "Baby is for Entertainment Purposes only", for she had made a No Expectations pact with you a long time ago. But there are days when she wakes up with the niggling question whether her plans actually involve you? It is all fine to 'uncomplicate' her life from all the pressures of Baby Milestones and deadlines, and to 'free' your life from being a performing monkey. It is addictive to curl up to you every night and your parents swear they have not slept better. We love it as you stretch out your arms and do a quick spot check over your shoulders for both of us (Ok A check, Baba check). But there are days when she does fear if she is stifling All Independent Thought in you. Is she Doing the Right Thing? Yara, yeh ishq nahee asaan...some difficult love this, all rivers of fire and all.

All I pray is that when that Playground Bully taunts you in public, you can be confident in your reply (considering your mom believes in non-violence so fisticuffs are not an option), and that you can impress upon your peers that you are secure in your self and are in a good place in life.

And well if that doesnt happen we will set Pesho on Raju.
Hugs, A

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

And We Have Touched Ground

What a fortnight it has been! Major planes, trains (albeit monorails) and automobiles part deux,miles of sun, sea and sand (thoda filmy hogaya).Throw in roof top Jacuzzis, a baby who would only boogie to Michael Jackson (AND HATES the Jodha Akbar soundtrack---AR Rahman if you are reading pliss to forgive) Kit the Cat being recited on a loop.Frankly the baby was the most well behaved amongst us...considering the posse included Gman, my mum, niece and the bub, you have some idea of what the road trip to end all road trips has been like. So What Did We Learn:

1) Every road trip needs a decent soundtrack...which should have been agreed upon before leaving home. Do inform your family that your musical interests veer more towards Emosional Atyachar in recent times. Will prevent major heartburn and angst when they refuse to play it. Frankly, it didnt matter as the bub thought now was the time to start his back seat riyaaz. Coming soon 'Baby does Saigol'.

2) All that drama of Aryans going forth and prospering is major bak bak...unless there is some Aryan kahani may gar bar regarding my family's DNA. Or if our ancestors took a lot of McDonald breaks. Brief Query: Why is it that you hunger for McD's when you are on a road trip but the moment you enter city limits the golden arches make you sick?
I repeat the baby was the only Well Behaved traveller (on ground or in the air).

3) Believe in yourself...this refers to an incident involving a lost mobile (mine) in Gold Coast. Said item had been placed in baby's pram (which has in the past couple of months reached the status of Safest Place to Deposit Valuables---hai dont I trust it to take care of my precious baby?) At the end of the excursion Gman could not find the mobile which had me in a fix as It Has Never Happened Before. Didnt hear the last of it from him, even though I repeated how I have kept house keys, mobile and wallet in the pram and they have never dropped out. Khair, towards the end of the trip as we are driving out of Sydney he turns to me in the backseat and says Aaj Ek Miracle Hogaya and how when he was putting in the pram the mobile dropped out. The pram had been folded up (and down) a couple of times since we left Gold Coast. He continued to wonder at the miracle that had visited our lives Really miracle hai miracle. I retorted that unless it involves the Virgin Mary there aint no miracles in my world. I also believe that every time a wife is vindicated an angel gets its wings.

4) I want a spa in my home....maybe it can be where the laundry is. I could visit that part of the house more often.

5) There is nothing more bitter sweet than to be seen off and greeted by a grumpy cat.


Trip pics to follow soon.

Sunday, July 12, 2009

Im Leaving On a Jet Plane

Acha thoda exaggerate kiya...jet plane nahee but sada Virgin Blue ka plane and I do know when Im returning.. hopefully July 24th. We are all maha excited and apprehensive and excited some more. It is Baby's first plane journey and Im hoping all goes well and he doesn't become THAT baby in Seat J10 but hai is plane may chota bacha bhee tha as people walk by us at the end of the flight. Lets see. Crossing my fingers and toes. How baby behaves will go a long way in planning a conference trip later in the month.

This is a break I have been loooong looking forward to (Brisbane, Gold Coast and Sydney) now and even if I dont do anything more significant than flick TV channels in the hotel room I will be one happy momma...in fact I think that is all I am planning on doing....yup, the rest of the family is welcome to traipse the beaches and gawk at the architectural wonders of the Australian east coast, I will not budge from Couch In Front of TV, perhaps will dip bub's toes in the water one day but nothhhhiiiiingggg else. Oh the joy of being away from gloomy Melbourne.

Acha, so what else has been happening other than counting down the days to Operation Getaway? The bub had a couple of trips to the hospital but considering I want to Forget All about It so no more mentioning something which could have been avoided. Just wanted to document it as it has been very important in the exercise of Mistakes That Made Me a Better Mum. My mom is in town so filling up on ghar ka khana...which means major tummy dramas...it is like coming back from hostel all over again...there was my mother even boiling the water for the kichdi and wondering what she was doing wrong when all the questionable content of the dhaba ka khana didnt even cause a dent in my constitution at uni. A friend very kindly told me that my stomach could not take hygienic food any more and was fighting it as something foreign, thoda sweat and ghar ki mitti dalo and all will be well. My mother being around means that we have to clean up on our toilet humour as she doesn't approve of our dire need to update each other on our Bowel Diaries (aaj Late Arrival tha...aaj Thai Air ki flight, smooth as silk. Oho aaj phir PIA -Perhaps It Arrives). So when Gman asked me what was plaguing me I had to be very ingenious and announced I cant Get Closure (well perhaps this joke is not meant for you if I have to explain it for you dear reader). My mom didn't...so you are actually in good company if it went over your head.

I had my birthday but it was so so as everyone was stressed or "flu-ed" out...Ms Niece did bake a cake and the baby really enjoyed looking at it. I will make up for the Disastrous Day once I hit the golden sands...


We are trying out the nick Khokon for the baby..as somehow Gulsher isn't cutting it.

Exchange of the Week: Gman promising the baby as the baby does his 'shake my booty' dance.."Teree shadi Beyoncé sey karvaoonga, baby I will get you married to Beyoncé OK"

Me: You do know she is married don't you

Gman continues unfazed: Dobara karvaoonga

**My sister continues to remind me What You Can Love You Can Also Kill...I was listening to her over the phone telling me how proud she is of my nephew, how mature he is now, how helpful, how intelligent, how smart, how....all good except she kept on breaking off the conversation to tell him how she was going to murder him if he
messed up her room one more time.

Chalo, bye bye..pray for me as I pray for you and yours!!

Friday, July 03, 2009

2013 door ast

2013 to find Vikram Seth's Suitable Girl? Hmmmphh he should have taken a page out of Rakhi S' book..a dozen episodes aur dholi tayyar