Sunday, March 20, 2011

Yaari Hai Imaan Mera Yaar Meri Zindagi

This post has been inspired by a series of tweets on "Good Muslims" I initiated a while ago in response to something the International Man of Mystery @polgrim had tweeted. He was of course discussing something entirely different and tre tre serious. I cannot remember how I jumped in with my "Good Muslim". Anyways as Sur Notes has reminded me, it has been a while since I posted. And lest people thing this is only a travel blog , I should get  on with the work of educating the Toddler about my world. So here are some of my tweets in dot points (lest Twitter Deck loses all of them). Now bear in mind the Good Muslim is a mythical creature that supposedly lived in celluloid once upon a time but in recent times let us say "Life imitates Art far more than Art imitates Life".

Good Muslims like Good Fences make for very good friends and neighbours. Bear in mind, you have to have this amount of hennaed hair before you can sing any yaarana songs with the Other. I will not get into the semantics of Hum Saath Saath Hain and the recreation of Ramayana and what that means for the Good Muslim as the Good Friend.. Ram's loyal friend and sevak? Geddit? Good. Hanuman's Bajrang Dal fanboys dont, so let us keep quiet about it.

Ok so the mythical 

  • "Good Muslims" should be ready to die an hour into movie.Preferably fighting Pakistanis.Should also know poetry and love biryani
  • Good Muslims say Laley Ki Jan and have their whiskey neat, their best friend is a Colonel. Rishi Kapoor's the 'goodest' of em all.
  • Good Muslims make sure there is azaan in the background when they enter the frame. Elope. Take a bullet for friend and country. Azaan tape not playing today .OK I die another day
  • The Good Muslim Tawaif. We will dance at lover's wedding, children's naamkaran, dance offs. We have no branches
  • Good Muslim women wear ghararas to bed,are borderline asthmatic & suffer unrequited love.They never forget feed the pigeon.
  • The last time a "Good Muslim" woman participated in Maa Exchange was oolie
  • Rooh Afza. Official drink of "Good Muslims" since 1906
  • Good Muslims name their children Kabir and Kamal
  • Last night when Pakistan played Australia.Good Muslims in India were damned no matter which team they supported  Pakistan? Desh Drohi. Australia? India Basher
  • By now Good Muslims should have perfected an answer to the query " You dont know the M's, but they are you know Muslim?"


  1. you forgot, the pretty, good muslim girl, must be won over by the hindu boy and not the other way around- lest our hindu majority status gets threatened!

    now go read my comment on anointing you the karan johar of all blogs...

  2. there was ghulam-e-mustafa but she dies doesnt she before she could be part of horrors Love Jehad. Ditto Kurbaan but she was a smart one

  3. Since you brought Kurbaan up... I watched in fascination how she suddenly started covering her head without any apparent coercion or even a request.

    I'm glad the Good Muslim woman doesn't forget to feed the pigeon. Speaking as a Good Hindu, I'd rather eat it, though.

  4. need to reconsider the second last point aneela - most indians (hindu and muslim) were rooting for Pakistan to win for two reasons:
    a) In an ICC World Cup scenario our South Asian identity is paramount and the established protocol is to support the south asian team (unless its your own home team in the fray) be it Bangla Desh vs England, or Pak vs Aussies . Basically the Cup must stay in South Asia.
    b) The other reason Indians wanted the Pakistan team to beat the Aussies is a more selfish one- now India does not have to face the Pak team in the Quarters!! ...DK

  5. LOL! good one Aneela.. Laale di jaan!! I remember this from so many movies!

  6. The Good Muslim also almost always got stuck into marrying the wrong girl, on account of having fallen in love with a burkha while in college.

  7. Loved the post and the comments:)

  8. Hi Aneela

    Loved your post. Parr ek shikayat hain. These chatpatta posts are too few and far between.

    Looking forward to more from you.

    Warm regards


  9. Good Muslims make sure there is azaan in the background when they enter the frame. Elope. Take a bullet for friend and country. Azaan tape not playing today .OK I die another day

    literally made me LOL. i love your posts!

  10. i'm sorry, i'm laughing far too much to add anything of value to this post

  11. hahahahahahaha! thanks for this Aneela! being a good muslim is indeed a tall order, what with so many cliches to live up to!


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