Friday, November 25, 2011

Hai Jazba Junoon To Himmat Na Haar Justajoo Jo Karey Woh Chuay Asmaan Mehnat Apni Ho Gi Pehchan Kabhi Na Bhoolo

There was a bake sale today. Rather a Meena Bazar, and amongst the rows upon rows of stalls offering me things that I ABSOLUTELY do not need, but oh look so pretty lined up like that, was one selling me my double chin and that third tyre around my waist. As the cashier added up my purchase, one of the bazaar organizers came up to me with a clipboard, asking me with a smile to choose from a list of charities ,one, where they could send the proceeds of my sale to. I chose a charity that benefited prison inmates. Kindred souls we.

Yup, all things said, a mother's "I am in it for the long haul" love considered, and the memory of some good days, it all does come down to sitting on the prayer mat, "lengthening your prayers" so to avoid being the one putting the toddler to bed. I had shared elsewhere how my prayer mat is the last bastion of retaining some sanity in this crazy adventure that is motherhood. Bathrooms are no longer sacred retreats where one can catch up on some reading on a smart phone, for toddlers have mastered the fine art of banging on the door whilst they work on the lock. So yes the prayer mat it is. I have no idea whether this disclosure was helpful for any of the parents out there but it did introduce me to a lovely woman who manages the work from home, mom to two, thinking person hats quite well. She describes herself as someone who

is clumsily juggling marriage, motherhood, moving, and editorship of a magazine. Fortunately, she is able to see the humour in this.

Oh yes she does, and you too will be able to read up on how she does this if you were to click on
or cut/paste this in your browser window

and if you are REALLY short of time and cannot read all of the entries (though you must, you must)
just visit
or 
 or
http://aafsterlife.blogspot.com/2011/04/nightmaid-on-elm-street.html and this which is so so brutally honest about the things we mothers go through , and yes it is funny, and moving at the same time
Oh just go ahead and just read her, please.


OK , so now my Lend Me Your Ears spiel does not end here. You  have to now go and vote for her. And the deadline is 1130 pm THAT IS HALF PAST ELEVEN IN THE NIGHT(Pakistan Time) November 28th THIS YEAR. And you ask me haw hai what craziness is this, we have not even heard what she is planning to do about the environment and here you are asking us to vote for her. Oh stop with that already. We have voted along caste lines, biradari, because we loved the candidate's father so, for the way a particular candidate looks,or to defy the current incumbent, or just because DADDY/MOMMY/HUSBAND/THE VILLAGE CHIEF told us to, 
so for just this once go ahead and click on the fifth star at


and it does not matter if you are not from Pakistan or have a grandmother who lived there at one time. Many, many Pakistanis with Green Cards and some with American passports end up in the Cabinet every now and then. We are all inclusive this way. So vote will ya?


 I could at this stage include some testimonials like how waiters from her local bistro love her for always tipping way way above the recommended ten percent, and how she was a conscientious little soul right from Grade 2. (Her art teacher tells us how she always colored between the lines and washed her brushes right after paint projects)

But I would rather just remind you of how incredibly easy it is to participate in this election.  Just point the cursor to this link and click. Many of us would like to vote come election time, but fifteen hours into queuing up for voter's registration or  the 39th time the guy at the counter asks us to Now SIGN THIS FORM IN TRIPLICATE AND WE WOULD LIKE TO SEE YOUR GRANDFATHER's DENTAL RECORDS AGAIN, we just give up. And you are left with that ache in your heart, for you too dream wistfully of the day when you could turn around and tell someone I Voted And I Felt Soo Good. And the euphoria, the euphoria, when your candidate wins. Oh man, oh man.

And trust me, can it ever get simpler than this? No moral dilemma as you ready to cast your vote, no one will ask you to take an oath on how you consider a certain sect non-Muslim. You do not have to bite your nails down worrying, OK so I voted for her/him but what if s/he decides to send more troops to Afghanistan. How does s/he look in a suit. The candidate's stand on Birkins. Whether the candidate's educational degrees are for real? Or whether their foreign policy experience is based on being able to view GHQ from their window. Or that they were plucky enough to take the winning last wicket some time. 


I ask you now to take a look at her Display Pic. Mashallah, what a beautiful set of teeth. Does it seem that the candidate will use state funds to pay for her gutka/pan habit. And she is a mother, a mother, even Bhutto had to give up on her Amazon daughter avatar and it was only as a mother that she finally achieved political success. So there you are:

Go ahead.

I think there is a Facebook page too, but as I promised I did not want this to be a stressful voting exercise for you involving logging in and looking up a page. (However, if you do yeah you)

Now hurry along, 
Yes You
Go Go Go


7 comments:

  1. Love Afia's writing. And now i love yours!

    ReplyDelete
  2. OK, OK, Am voting. They should consider you for the role of election-campaigner. You know, the way Jaya Prada and all, started their political careers. :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. @Shazaf: Arey I told you dont loiter on my blog. go go vote and get your friends to vote too. Let a mom win.

    @Banno: The slot of election campaigner has already been taken. I wanted to use Jai Ho as the campaign song but then worried whether I will have to pay the Congress a royalty for it

    ReplyDelete
  4. What Banno said. Talk about haranguing!

    Before you start walking meaningfully in my direction though, I've voted as directed. *walks off muttering about pushy Pathans*

    :P

    ReplyDelete
  5. The campaign manager officially selects you to be The Aafster Life's Media Manager. As campaign manager I am now only left with the duties of harassing people (read Khi-style) into voting and of course tweeting Oprah and Alyson Hannigan and Ellen DeGeneres or any other blog-celeb who dares to make an appearance on my timeline or .. is unfortunate enough to be on twitter :P (Sorry, Afia, I know your pretty jaw has dropped down to the fantastic keyboard, but I'm totally in the groove).

    You are now officially in charge of all the press releases.

    Hey can we get Samina Pirzada to vote?

    And I totally love your sense of humor. That goes without saying!

    ReplyDelete
  6. My beautiful set of teeth is refusing to retreat into my mouth.

    ReplyDelete
  7. erm. the malaysian blog awards are coming up... in three days?

    how come nary a peep from you on that?

    huh?


    huh?

    ..


    ok i made that up.

    but curious to try you out as my media manager

    ReplyDelete

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